We interrupt this barrage of “How you gonna go to school like?” posts to bring you the following:
If I had my act together, there would be a monster post in the works reviewing, recapping, rehashing and renegotiating the Grammys. Most years, I watch from home, while Sam and Wrall each watch from their homes. We text and call liberally to discuss decisions and debate deliveries.
This year, however, I was on a ferry and a highway. I arrived home late to find that, miraculously, the television had last been tuned to CBS*. The way my DVR works, you can rewind a program on the channel you were on even when the TV and cable box were off. It’s brilliant is what it is.
*I was thinking about it and can’t remember watching anything on CBS. There aren’t any programs on that channel that I watch regularly, to my knowledge. The last thing I remember watching was Lost on Wednesday night. Hmm. Think someone broke in while I was away and used my TV? If so, could you have cleaned up a little? This place was a mess!
I immediately hit the ‘fast rewind’ button to see what I had missed. I intentionally didn’t look at the screen, because even though this isn’t a scripted drama, I didn’t want to ruin any potential surprises. The rewind stopped and wouldn’t go any farther just as Gwyneth Paltrow was emerging to introduce…
I knew who it was immediately as she began expounding on their ‘singular brilliance’ and ‘unparalleled ability to innovate’.
…Radiohead. Playing with the USC Trojan marching band. Well done, mates. That was a performance fit for the Grammy’s. I stood, captivated, with my suitcase and guitar still in my hand. Suddenly, realizing that I wasn’t actually recording, I grabbed the remote and pressed the red button with that familiar design on it. The TV seized and jerked. Smoke began pouring from the cable box. The whole unit lurched forward like an overloaded washing machine. My television came tumbling over, breaking into two large and, incredibly, symmetrical pieces. A small man emerged from the wreckage, dusted himself off and declared, “I’m hungry. Got any jerky?”
Actually, none of that happened. I know, you believed it too, right? What did happen is this: the TV fast-forwarded to present moment, and disallowed rewind. I was just in time to Lil’ Wayne perform with Robin Thicke and Allain Toussain and receive an award for best rap album, then see Alison Krauss and Robert Plant play a song and receive the award for album of the year. Hmm. Was that trend evident throughout the night? You’ll have to fill me in, because otherwise there is no way for me to find out. Hopefully Radiohead won something, because let’s all remember how great In Rainbows is, not to mention how groundbreaking its release was.
Mostly, I’m lucky to have seen what I did see. I’m sure there were some questionable moments and all I got to see was ‘singular brilliance’ and an ‘unparalleled ability to innovate’.