The Regina Monologues

While in Calgary, we took Bessie to a Minute Muffler to have the tires rotated and the front end aligned. Justin, our man there, was as straight up and forthcoming as we’ve ever encountered in a mechanic, telling us what we don’t need and charging us for the minimum work. He was able to squeeze us into a hectic day despite our being very late for the appointment and even gave some tips on how to fix another problem that we’ve been having for what could end up being ten dollars. He represented you well, Canadian mechanics!

We set forth on Trans-Canada Route 1 toward Winnipeg. The landscape over the course of the day was the most nothing we’ve ever seen apart from western Texas. The road stretched from horizon to horizon in a straight line and for as far the eye could see on both sides there was nothing. No mountains, no greenery, no houses, no animals. It was absolutely amazing. The sunset lasted for hours, changing colors and lighting up different parts of the sky. I couldn’t keep me eyes off the rearview. It was so beautiful that it made me want to swear.

We had planned to stay the night in Regina, and just before arriving, we pulled over to stretch our legs. We hadn’t reached the city lights yet and there were no towns nearby. Looking up, we could see more stars than I’ve ever before seen. Even in Maine and on Nantucket, we’d never seen such a sky. The dimmest stars were visible and the bright ones were brilliant. There was no moon, but we could still see all around from starlight.

We checked into the motel in Regina and in an ironic twist, none of us slept very well or very long despite staying in the nicest room we’ve had yet. I guess it happens that way sometimes. We did absolutely nothing while in town, as we have a little appointment with a few party-going Manitobans today and had to split bright and early, but our impressions of Regina are… Well, we don’t have any, really.

We do have this, though. It’s something that I’ve wanted to share with you since we were in Montana a few days ago. With no air conditioning, we’ve become reliant on 70 miles per hour to create a cooling breeze. This is what that “breeze” looks like:

Fortunately, we didn’t lose Trick Johnson’s birth certificate the first time we rolled the window down!

Speaking of Trick Johnson, a bit of sneezing inspired him to ask about the origins of the use of “God Bless You.” He has decided to use “Demons Be Gone” instead. Sam has taken to “DBGB’s!” as his exclamation of choice. I’m not switching (at least not during “Vanilla Place”).

Things:

Demons be gone is a thing.

Wind is a thing.

The Trans-Canada is a thing.

Nice Canadian mechanics is a thing.