I missed the no-hitter that Clay Buchholz pitched on Saturday, but I have an excuse: Miss Fairchild was playing a killer party in Rhode Island. It’s called Providence is Burning and it’s truly the bee’s knees. This is how it works: Micah and Jackson, along with Certified Max (and Sammy Bananas) team up with Firehouse 13 (a really cool converted firehouse on the west side of Providence that houses art and artists) to create a monthly all-hands-on-deck party with dancing and fun and all kinds of things!

But let’s backtrack a little to earlier in the day on Saturday. Prior to heading to Providence to burn down the Firehouse (irony intended, I presume), Miss Fairchild decided it would be fun to clean Daddy Wrall’s ears.

Dont be scared.

Now, having heard too many horror stories about cue tips and peroxide, we decided to go the new age route and use ear cones. It’s a little loud and a bit awkward (especially if that hair gets brushed by a burning ember!), but effective nonetheless. You can get the general gist from that oh-so-fun photograph above.

Sam Nice (He has too many names doesn’t he? I’m going to have to come up with a few more for myself so as not to feel left out) did the driving to Providence. It’s a drive he knows well, from his time living there, so he decided to take some liberties…

We were listening to Stevie Wonder and as so often happens, Sam decided to move his head back in forth in that figure eight pattern that Stevie does.

We’re convinced that his music would inspire this exact movement regardless of whether he did it first. I mean look at the little kids on Sesame Street. They’re doing it too! So, the problem with this movement is that you’re rarely looking forward when you do it. Not to mention Sam was wearing sunglasses at the time. So, inspired by Stevie’s music, eye wear and dance movement, you can imagine Sam’s next step would be to close his eyes and really live the music: a fine option, but you see, he was driving at the time, so…

[At this point, all of the parents reading this are pretty much having a heart attack with anticipation that we crashed the van or something…]

But, no. Apparently, Stevie (as Sam) is a pretty good driver. And Sam Nice (as Sammy Bananas) is also a pretty good driver. So, for the first time ever, the entire five piece live band and all of its trappings was able to go from one perfomance place to another in the same vehicle. Can you tell we’re excited about this van?

[On an indulgent side note, the sadness I had in trading my little Ford Focus for this very large really big ultra huge Supervan only really manifests in one way. As my brother put it: “your old car had the best stereo of any car I’ve ever been in!” And he ain’t lying either. With no extras whatsoever, that little bugger got the job done. Ooh La La, Sha Sha… has never sounded better. Bessie’s sound is not quite so pleasing to the ears, though I must admit: Emmylou Harris and Lyle Lovett both sound great in there.]

And speaking of music in the van, we had a really nice moment with “Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong,” which is actually on Sam’s iPod (not that there’s anything wrong with that. Quite the opposite, in fact.) The only thing I would state for the record is this: Spin Doctors=Not Funk Music. Anyhow, that was Todd “The Rocket”‘s entrance music as we picked him up to kick off this little tour. We have the whole boxset and we’re listening to it, doggone it!

Okay, so Micah Jackson (two guys) killed it on the decks to start the Providence night. Then, Joe Beats and Blak played a great set. Very good musicians and dudes and hopefully, we’ll play with them some more. Like, soon. Joe, if you’re reading this, seems like things are going well, but maybe the Admiral got you a little overconfident. Be careful of that, man. You’re better than that t-shirt.

And so are you, dear readers. Have a look sometime. Aren’t you better than that t-shirt? And maybe the t-shirt’s not so bad. These ones aren’t. I think they might even be good enough for you.

Did I mention there was someone in a mouse costume at our show? No, that was a bunny, I’m told. She doesn’t look so psyched in the photo up at the top of this, which couldn’t have had anything to do with Miss Fairchild, judging from the other smiling faces. Maybe she lost a bet. The important thing is this: your costume is appreciated! Your lifting of your droopy ears is appreciated! You are appreciated!

And, as a last note about Providence for a while, I want to personally apologize to Phil and Phil’s girlfriend. Though I did not encourage or even have knowledge of a S—-‘s tattoo application attempt, I did give him the tattoo that he used. Indeed, the new trend is licking the tattoo to apply it. We saw it in Boston, we saw it in Providence. But, let’s keep this to consensual licking, okay? And to Phil’s girlfriend, you deserve an apology for my forgetting your name! (Or never knowing it in the first place.)

Speaking of which, thanks to everyone who came and helped and enjoyed the evening with us. More about Nantucket and other sovereignties shortly.